How It Works
From submission to strategy in under 30 seconds. No sales calls, no fluff, just data.
Digital Ingestion
You feed us your URL and your biggest pain points. We don't need your passwords, just your honesty.
AI Neural Roast
Our Gemini-powered engine tears through your site architecture, identifying conversion-killers and UX nightmares.
Evidence Capture
We grab a live snapshot of the crime scene (your website) to document exactly where you're losing money.
Actionable Recovery
Get a custom score and 3 high-impact fixes you can implement tonight to start winning back your customers.
Why settle for a "Pretty" site that doesn't Sell?
Most designers build websites for their portfolios, not for your profit. We use a combination of cutting-edge AI and conversion-rate-optimization best practices to tell you exactly where you're leaving money on the table.
Brutal Honesty
Agencies will blow smoke to get your retainer. We'll tell you your hero section is garbage because it is.
AI-Powered Speed
Get insights in seconds that usually take a human 'strategist' two weeks and four Zoom calls to find.
Conversion Focused
We don't care about 'pretty'. We care about profit. Our audits focus on making your phone ring.
Zero Risk
It's free. If you don't like the roast, you haven't lost a dime. If you do like it, we can help you fix it.